Lightening our load ...

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30

As I look back on this spiritual formation experience, I remember our times of devotion together. I remember the times of sharing, the times of worship, the times of simple silence where we all sought out the heart of God. I chose this verse from Matthew as the passage of scripture that I would like to close out with. We are told that we need to be the one who decides to come after Jesus. He focuses on all those who are weary and burdened, but isn’t that all of us? We are told that we will receive the promised rest, and that he is willing and able to help us to learn from him. He wants to lighten our load.

Have you felt that time of lightening? It is a time where we feel like we can make it. It is a time where we feel like we don’t have to go it alone. I have learned that we all need help with our daily walk. This help can come in many different forms, but some of them are as easy as actually praying for each other. We have sat in silence together and worshiped. We have studied and meditated on certain passages of scripture. We have spent time in a prayer exercise for our boys where some of us were praying so hard for our boys that tears flowed.

Many of you commented that this was a great reminder for you, to work harder at your spiritual walk. Many of you told me of ways that you are trying to implement some of these spiritual disciplines in your life as you work with each other and help our boys. I have enjoyed these stories, because it has made me realize that all was not in vain.

There have also been times when some of you have told me that our times together have been very challenging in ways you have never experienced. Not everyone in our group is at the same place when it comes to working through some of these disciplines, and that’s ok. I am reminded that our boys are all at different places as well when it comes to drawing near to God. They may have a hard time when it comes to focus and meditation. Some of our boys may have a hard time going to that quiet place with God, because they are not prepared to open up their heart out of fear or even rejection. These are all thoughts that we need to ponder individually and as a group as we try to share our faith with those around us.

This project has been called “Overflow,” and I hope that you have been able to see God’s love flowing out of your heart as you hold out the Word of God. That was actually one of my objectives. I wanted us all to be able to take some of the things we have learned and apply them to this ministry. I feel we have learned how to focus a little better. I feel we have learned how to use the Word of God to battle those challenges that come up in our lives. I feel we have learned how to do so many things including service, simplifying our lives, and even being reminded what worship can be like. I feel our lives have been challenged, and our spirit has been encouraged. This is where the “overflow” comes out. This is where we learn how to take our own experiences with God and share those with our boys and our families. This is where we work together as a community to help transform the lives of our boys.

I have been feeling that sense of “Holy Expectancy” that we discussed during our worship time together. Instead of it being towards our worship service, it is towards our ministry together. I have found myself coming to God and praying for us all as we work ourselves to exhaustion to try and help our boys learn to live and learn how to be loved. We have a hard job, so it is important that we spend as much time as possible in the Word, in worship, in prayer, in silence with God, simplifying, and serving so we can be prepared for anything that comes our way, and our spirit is so full, that it overflows more and more each day into the lives of those we love.

Thank you for participating in this project and thank you for loving and caring for me enough to be honest with me about your feelings throughout this project. You have all blessed and encouraged my life.

Jason

Loss, lament, and leadership

But the Israelites broke faith in regard to the devoted things: Achan son of Carmi son of Zabdi son of Zerah, of the tribe of Judah, took some of the devoted things; and the anger of the Lord burned against the Israelites.

Joshua sent men from Jericho to Ai, which is near Beth-aven, east of Bethel, and said to them, "Go up and spy out the land." And the men went up and spied out Ai. Then they returned to Joshua and said to him, "Not all the people need go up; about two or three thousand men should go up and attack Ai. Since they are so few, do not make the whole people toil up there." So about three thousand of the people went up there; and they fled before the men of Ai. The men of Ai killed about thirty-six of them, chasing them from outside the gate as far as Shebarim and killing them on the slope. The hearts of the people melted and turned to water.

Then Joshua tore his clothes, and fell to the ground on his face before the ark of the Lord until the evening, he and the elders of Israel; and they put dust on their heads. Joshua said, "Ah, Lord God! Why have you brought this people across the Jordan at all, to hand us over to the Amorites so as to destroy us? Would that we had been content to settle beyond the Jordan! O Lord, what can I say, now that Israel has turned their backs to their enemies! The Canaanites and all the inhabitants of the land will hear of it, and surround us, and cut off our name from the earth. Then what will you do for your great name?"

Joshua 7:1-9 NRSV

About six years ago, I started using Michael Carotta's model of spiritual formation as one way to understand spiritual growth. In his view, spiritual growth happens in three areas (frequently unequally): spiritual growth, moral living, and emotional intelligence. Obviously, when we first encounter a disaster as Joshua and the Israelites did, our first response tends to be neither spiritual nor moral/intellectual, but rather emotional. Fear. Hurt. Grief. Uncertainty. Remorse. God wired us to be emotional beings. Somewhere along the line we have to acknowledge that, and stop denying or disconnecting from our emotions and passions as I believe that we have been falsely taught to do in the past.

But after we have a moment to consider the crisis from more of a temporal (or geographic) distance, then we naturally begin to try to figure out whether what happened did so as a result of our behavior (moral living) or God's plan (spiritual faith) or something else. Many things happen in this world that don't correspond to our view of God and what we believe he ought to allow. And so yes, you would be so right if you were to say that this has more to do with us (and our mental and emotional adjustments) than it really does with God. But at the same time, God is not a disinterested observer in this process. Who knows but this adversary or adversity has been placed before us to strengthen or test us. It is not given us to know. But God made us beings who would consider these questions.

Joshua's attitude toward God (and that of the elders) is one of lament. Is he confused? No doubt, because Joshua is obviously blind-sided by all of this. A possible reason that God asked him to stand was to let him know that no amount of lament or worship was going to make this right; other action would be required and that action is consecration. In this situation, God tells Joshua exactly went wrong and devises a process by which not only is it possible to define who is responsible, but it is possible to make the people ready to continue their faithful obedience to God.

To feel emotions is a part of being human. And what they tell us is important, but before we make them the final analysis, we need to remember that they are only a part of the evidence. We need to weigh the emotion, the moral, and the spiritual whenever we are working our way through any situation. This may take time, if for nothing else than to make sure that we have brought them into balance. May God help us find balance in our lives.

Grace and peace,

Ron