Your place in my story ...

Today’s devotional thought is from Shiann:

Donald Miller, in his most recent book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, discusses writing his story and editing it for a movie. This changes his perspective on how he sees his life. He is coming out of a deep depression and just a general funk and discusses it throughout the book. I wanted to share this quote with you from the book because it profoundly touched me.

In writing a story, I felt the way I hope God feels as He writes the world. Sitting over the planets and placing tiny people in tiny wombs. If I have a hope, it is that God sat over the dark nothing and wrote you and me specifically in the story and put us with the sunset and the rainstorm as though to say "enjoy your place in My story. The beauty of it means that you matter. And you can create within it just as I have created you."

I’ve wondered, though, if one of the reasons we fail to acknowledge the brilliance of life is because we don’t want the responsibility inherent in that acknowledgement. We don’t want to be characters in a story because characters have to move and breathe and face conflict with courage. And if life isn’t remarkable, then we don’t have to do any of that. We can be unwilling victims rather than grateful participants.

People seem to find it easy to live as victims. We can “waller” (as my momma says) in our stuff as well as any hog in the mud. Yet God calls us out of that. He gives us people in our lives that need us so we’ll give up the wallerin’. He gives us opportunities to serve and see past our own hurts long enough to see God working for another. If God is working in the life of another, He can work in my life, too!

The other noted point here is to engage in life means to face conflict and “wrassle” (as Momma says) with life. We have the power of God, why not be courageous?!

Shiann

Only be still ...

Today’s devotional thought is from Angela:

It happened after this that the people of Moab with the people of Ammon, and others with them besides the Ammonites, came to battle against Jehoshaphat...

Then Jehoshaphat stood in the assembly of Judah and Jerusalem, in the house of the LORD, before the new court, and said: “O LORD God of our fathers, are You not God in heaven, and do You not rule over all the kingdoms of the nations, and in Your hand is there not power and might, so that no one is able to withstand You?...

O our God, will You not judge them? For we have no power against this great multitude that is coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are upon You.” ...

Then the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jahaziel the son of Zechariah, the son of Benaiah, the son of Jeiel, the son of Mattaniah, a Levite of the sons of Asaph, in the midst of the assembly. And he said, “Listen, all you of Judah and you inhabitants of Jerusalem, and you, King Jehoshaphat! Thus says the LORD to you: ‘Do not be afraid nor dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, but God’s. Tomorrow go down against them. They will surely come up by the Ascent of Ziz, and you will find them at the end of the brook before the Wilderness of Jeruel. You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the LORD, who is with you, O Judah and Jerusalem!’ Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out against them, for the LORD is with you.”

2 Chronicles 20:1,5,6,12,14-17 (NKJV)

I don’t sit still very well. Even while watching a movie at home with Daniel, my mind and my hands seem to find something to do. There’s always paperwork to finish, a splinter to help pull out, a pencil stuck in the over-heating dryer…again! But sometimes the will, energy, and power “to do” is stripped away, and we, largely based on our choice of response, can be left feeling either terrified, divinely serene, or maybe a little bit of both. Not a pleasant learning experience for most of us humans.

Early one morning before school, one of our boys was feeling and loudly vocalizing his anger, his defiance, and his hurt. My daughter was tired, scared by that morning’s chaos, and in need of more attention than I had the energy to give. My husband was very upset with our boy’s poor attitude, my baby hadn’t slept well, and I was desperately trying to keep a hold of some form of control for everyone’s sake. Yet it was all crumbling and blowing away as my tired and hurting family walked out the door. I tried to read the morning’s devotional after they left, but the words weren't making sense in my cluttered brain. I tried to clean my house and organize the day, but all of it…the dirt, the clutter, the schedules…only made me feel more alone and defeated.

I wandered my eerily quiet house feeling outraged, sad, fearful, tired, overwhelmed, aggressive, and ready to fight for peace to return to my home. My back was hurting so I gave up and sat down on the couch. I didn’t really verbally pray because I was too confused to form a thought. I didn’t sing because the tears were too close to brave going that deep within. I sat. I didn’t fix. I didn’t plan. I didn’t run. I didn’t attack. I sat…I felt…and I trembled, realizing God was present; reading, hearing, and soothing all I was feeling. And it was wonderful to be crippled in His arms while His Spirit voiced it all. I felt so free, overwhelmed by passion for those I love while at the same time experiencing mind-blowing peace not “doing” a thing to protect them or fix their wounds.

Hours later, my daughter came home from school joyful, excited, and safe. My baby was her usual sweet self throughout the day. Later that evening, my husband and our boy resolved their issue in about 5 minutes. It’s amazing what God can mend when we don’t snag the process with our own forced presence or perceptions. It’s humbling how much better we can witness His work in the lives of our treasured ones when we, at His bidding, discipline our passion to be still before Him.

Exodus 14:14 (NIV)
The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still."

Psalm 46:10 (NIV)
"Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."

Blessings,

Angela

Some burdens ...

For today, a prayer:

O Holy One,
O King of all kings,
and Lord of all lords,

We come before you now
your people, a burdened people.
We come with burdens that belong to us,
and burdens that belong to others.
We come with burdens given to us,
and burdens we have placed on our own shoulders.

O Mighty One, we bring these burdens to you.
Some burdens we ask you to take from us,
so we might lift less weary hands to praise you.
Some burdens we ask you to heal,
so we might stand together unimpeded
in your presence.
Some burdens we ask you to change
from burden into blessing,
if only in that we see the gifts
you give us aright.
Some burdens we ask you to teach us to carry,
so we might suffer alongside you
as you work to bring healing
and wholeness to your world, even now,
as a foretaste of tomorrow and forever.

So now, O Mighty One, we ask you to lift us up,
burdens and all.
Even now, lift us up so that we might see and praise
you as you will only be fully revealed
in the end of all time:
clearly King, indisputably Lord,
incontestably One God, Only God,
infinitely removed from all impostors.

Even as we see the work of your hand,
we do not understand.
Even when we see you face to face,
you will remain beyond our comprehension.
Yet because of your steadfast love we know you,
love you, trust you, hope in you –
Today and tomorrow and until Jesus comes.
Until then we pray through him and for him
to come again.

Amen.

In all things praise God,

Ron

For you I wait ...

Walk with me in a meditation on the word at Psalm 25:1-10:

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul.

There is one God; I acknowledge you as God, and confess I am not God. Help me to pray and act that way.

O my God, in you I trust; do not let me be put to shame;
do not let my enemies exult over me.
Do not let those who wait for you be put to shame;
let them be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

I put my trust in the one who has always loved me and always sought to help me. I trust you, O God, and I trust those who choose to trust in you. I have my enemies, and I do not expect that I will always be right, or that I will always win. Please, on the days I will not be victorious, on the days I must be humbled, let it be humility that I learn and not humiliation that I experience. Help me to watch and wait for your movement, O God, so that I may walk alongside you and avoid vain, ignorant, or evil ways. At the end of the day, may shame be the reward of those who have behaved shamefully, for those who knowingly and persistently ignore your will and your way.

Make me to know your ways, O LORD;
teach me your paths.
Lead me in your truth, and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all day long.

Your word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light upon my path. Your word reveals your path to me, and yet, you mark the way that I should go in other ways as well. You bless some efforts more than others. You provide the resources for some work and not others. You bring me joy, a spiritual satisfaction, when I do certain things that is notably different than others. You create fruit from certain seeds that I plant, and not others. Let me examine my life to see what you mark, where you bless, what you provide, when you bring joy, and what you multiply. Let me examine this in prayer with you until a path is clearer, if it takes me all day long. If the path remains foggy, help me understand the lack of clarity tells me something, too.

Be mindful of your mercy, O LORD,
and of your steadfast love, for they have been from of old.
Do not remember the sins of my youth or my transgressions;
according to your steadfast love remember me,
for your goodness' sake, O LORD!

Your love and mercy are ancient and everlasting; they changed this world before I was born, and they will continue to bring life long after I am dust. You have not forgotten the first time I faithfully spoke your name as a child, and yet I ask you to forget the first time, and every time, I acted like I didn’t know you at all. You must wonder if I will ever grow up. After I have learned my lesson, help me to forget the details. Let me have at least temporary amnesia, so that I might be able to function without attempting to carry the oppressive burden that Jesus has already taken away from me. Remember my faithfulness, remember my love, remember the good things in my life, O Lord, because you are good. Your steadfast love never ceases. May your goodness bear fruit in my life for your glory, O God.

Good and upright is the LORD;
therefore he instructs sinners in the way.
He leads the humble in what is right,
and teaches the humble his way.

You are really the only one who can believably teach us what is good. Thank you, O God, that you do instruct us, hard-headed, hard-nosed, stiff necked people, in your way. Instead of living in immoderate pride, help us to see ourselves as you see us, God. May we understand humility, not as some sort of feigned self-abasement. Instead, help us to see humility as understand who you are, understand who others are, and understanding who we are. You value us, perhaps for reasons we do not understand. As we become truly humble, may your path for us become more clear.

All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness,
for those who keep his covenant and his decrees.

Whatever path is yours, we will always be able to recognize this about it: it will be the way of steadfast love, it will be the way of faithfulness. Knowing that, let us behave toward you as you have behaved toward us.

Grace, and peace,

Ron

The eye roll ...

Never aggravate an old bear!

Last week someone rolled their eyes at me. Not just a quick arc of the eyes from one corner to another, this eye roll had a Stevie Wonder head sway with it. It was as if his eyes couldn’t roll significantly enough on their own; they needed some help from the neck.

At the time, I was serving as a guest lecturer in Dudley Chancey’s Introduction to Ministry class at Oklahoma Christian. I enjoyed it. Thirty young men and women sat in the class, alert and taking notes (their quiz grade for the day was based on the quality of their note taking). It was a good opportunity to talk with them about the challenges of working with at-risk children, and their questions were interesting and insightful.

Toward the end of class, Dudley interviewed me about various aspects of ministry. After several questions, the topic shifted. Because Dudley was aware of several ministers who had lost their jobs in the last couple of weeks over sexual issues, he asked me about ways to maintain sexual fidelity as a minister. I gave a couple of suggestions which stirred no more reaction than a few pens moving over a piece of paper. But when I got personal, and talked about a personal practice I find helps me keep my heart right, I saw a young man in the back row give the eye roll. I don’t think that he really meant for me to see it, but I did. After all, you see a lot when you teach a class. When his eyes finished their half orbit, my eyes were there waiting on his.

Now, I didn’t get mad, but I wasn’t exactly amused either. Someone asked me a question and I gave an answer. If you don’t like my answer, okay. If you don’t want to practice the practices I practice, then don’t. I’m good with that. But don’t minimize me with an eye roll. Don’t minimize an issue like sexual fidelity by not considering simple, every day practices which can help prevent it.

I didn’t say anything to embarrass him, but a point which I would normally make and move on now required me to hammer it home. The annoyed young man thought that I didn’t get it, that I don’t understand contemporary culture, that I wasn’t aware of the world as it really is. I hammered the point because the young man didn’t get the fact that sexual sin could kill his marriage and ministry, that contemporary culture is oversexed, and that the world seems to expect us to live like hormone-driven animals instead of spiritual creatures making free-will choices with their intelligence.

Afterwards Dudley and I shared lunch. “They think we’re just a couple of dirty old men,” Dudley said. “They just don’t get how quickly this stuff can bring anybody down.” I think that Dudley is right. A couple of them just didn’t get it.

The whole episode reminded me of what happened in 2 Kings 2:23-24:

He went up from there to Bethel; and while he was going up on the way, some small boys came out of the city and jeered at him, saying, "Go away, baldhead! Go away, baldhead!" When he turned around and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the Lord. Then two she-bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.

I need for you to understand that I had no hopes for a bear to come along and maul the young man listening to my lecture. No finger pointing. No curses. Perhaps it would be better for that to have happened, though, and for him to have learned something from it, than for him to go blithely on and find out the hard way, ten or fifteen years into a marriage, that he isn’t sexually invulnerable after all. Our sexuality, after all, is more powerful than we can manage on our own. Never think, “It couldn’t happen to me.” Only with the help of God, through persistent spiritual disciplines, and hopefully with the partnership of a loving spouse, can we be holy people.

May God help us to learn from those who walk alongside us. May their wisdom and insight help us, guide us, and shape us so that we don’t have to learn everything the hard way.

Grace and peace,

Ron