Our Saturday devotional is a text from God’s Word:
The word of the Lord came to Jonah a second time, saying, "Get up, go to Nineveh, that great city, and proclaim to it the message that I tell you." So Jonah set out and went to Nineveh, according to the word of the Lord. Now Nineveh was an exceedingly large city, a three days' walk across. Jonah began to go into the city, going a day's walk. And he cried out, "Forty days more, and Nineveh shall be overthrown!" And the people of Nineveh believed God; they proclaimed a fast, and everyone, great and small, put on sackcloth.
When the news reached the king of Nineveh, he rose from his throne, removed his robe, covered himself with sackcloth, and sat in ashes. Then he had a proclamation made in Nineveh: "By the decree of the king and his nobles: No human being or animal, no herd or flock, shall taste anything. They shall not feed, nor shall they drink water. Human beings and animals shall be covered with sackcloth, and they shall cry mightily to God. All shall turn from their evil ways and from the violence that is in their hands. Who knows? God may relent and change his mind; he may turn from his fierce anger, so that we do not perish."
When God saw what they did, how they turned from their evil ways, God changed his mind about the calamity that he had said he would bring upon them; and he did not do it.
But this was very displeasing to Jonah, and he became angry. He prayed to the Lord and said, "O Lord! Is not this what I said while I was still in my own country? That is why I fled to Tarshish at the beginning; for I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love, and ready to relent from punishing. And now, O Lord, please take my life from me, for it is better for me to die than to live." And the Lord said, "Is it right for you to be angry?" Then Jonah went out of the city and sat down east of the city, and made a booth for himself there. He sat under it in the shade, waiting to see what would become of the city.
Jonah 3:1-4:5 – NRSV
Blessings,
Ron
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
Righteous wrath in human flesh ...
Imagine, if you will, that you live in first century Judea. You are blessed with a teenage son, Nathan, who has just gone through his bar mitzvah, his coming of age as a Jewish “man.” For years you have described to him what the Temple was like, and what it would be like when he was old enough to take, for the first time, the sacrificial lamb into the temple courts for his family. You have carefully tutored him on what to say and to do, and he has been an eager learner. He has raised the lamb, the lamb that he picked, from birth. It is beautiful. It is perfect. It is well-chosen as a young man’s first gift to God.
With some considerable pride you set out for Jerusalem and the Passover feast. The city is unimaginably crowded with countless pilgrims and their sacrifices. Nathan waits in line for his opportunity to enter the Temple and offer his lamb. As you enter the temple courts, a priest asks you if you have your temple tax, so you prompt Nathan, who reaches into his bag and shows the coins. “No,” says the priest, “these coins can’t be taken into the temple – they have the image of Caesar stamped on them. They’re idolatrous!” Nathan looks at you for a clue as to what to do, but you’re both on unfamiliar ground here.
“So what are we supposed to do?” you ask.
The priest points over to a table on one side of the entrance and says, “You’ll have to take this Roman money over there and exchange it for temple coins.” You start to balk, but one of the temple guards glares at you and nods his head in the direction of the exchange tables. You are mad, but grudgingly, you make the trade, only to discover that the exchange rate means that you’ve already spent much of the money you’d saved for the trip. You grouse about it to the man exchanging the money, but he just shrugs his shoulders and turns to the next customer.
You pat Nathan on the back, and say, “it’s alright, Nathan, everything will be fine.” You both turn toward the Temple gate.
As you enter, a priest comes up to Nathan to examine his lamb. He shakes his head; “This lamb won’t do – you’ll need to get a replacement.”
“That lamb is perfect,” you growl back, as you see the hurt on Nathan’s face.
“I am the priest, and I make that determination. Think what you want, and say what you will, you will not sacrifice that animal at this temple.” He pauses, then makes an offer: “ That vendor over to the right will buy this grubby little beast, and sell you one that is suitable.”
Your blood is boiling, but your son is watching. You stomp over to the sheep seller, who spends more time assessing you than he does Nathan’s lamb. He makes a ridiculous offer for Nathan’s animal and quotes an astronomical price for the one he is willing, “out of the goodness of his heart,” to sell you. It is as if the man knows exactly how much money you have in your pocket. And the lamb he is selling? It is not half the animal that Nathan’s is.
While struggling with my temper and my decision, a quiet man with this intense face comes up, lifts Nathan’s lamb into his arms, says, “Beautiful animal,” and then asks us to stand over against the wall for a few moments. What happens next is best described in the words of a man who later became a friend of mine:
Jesus went up to Jerusalem. In the temple he found people selling cattle, sheep, and doves, and the money changers seated at their tables. Making a whip of cords, he drove all of them out of the temple, both the sheep and the cattle. He also poured out the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables. He told those who were selling the doves, "Take these things out of here! Stop making my Father's house a marketplace!" His disciples remembered that it was written, "Zeal for your house will consume me." The Jews then said to him, "What sign can you show us for doing this?" Jesus answered them, "Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up." The Jews then said, "This temple has been under construction for forty-six years, and will you raise it up in three days?" But he was speaking of the temple of his body. After he was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered that he had said this; and they believed the scripture and the word that Jesus had spoken.
John 2:13-22 – NRSV
What does the righteous anger of God look like? This story provides us with one sample. Let’s hear the words of David describing the holy wrath of God:
Then the earth reeled and rocked;
the foundations of the heavens trembled
and quaked, because he was angry.
Smoke went up from his nostrils,
and devouring fire from his mouth;
glowing coals flamed forth from him.
He bowed the heavens, and came down;
thick darkness was under his feet.
He rode on a cherub, and flew;
he was seen upon the wings of the wind.
He made darkness around him a canopy,
thick clouds, a gathering of water.
Out of the brightness before him
coals of fire flamed forth.
The Lord thundered from heaven;
the Most High uttered his voice.
He sent out arrows, and scattered them —
lightning, and routed them.
Then the channels of the sea were seen,
the foundations of the world were laid bare
at the rebuke of the Lord,
at the blast of the breath of his nostrils.
He reached from on high, he took me,
he drew me out of mighty waters.
He delivered me from my strong enemy,
from those who hated me;
for they were too mighty for me.
They came upon me in the day of my calamity,
but the Lord was my stay.
He brought me out into a broad place;
he delivered me, because he delighted in me.
2 Samuel 22:8-20 – NRSV
When evil interferes with you, the child of God, know that it does not please God. When someone treats a child in an evil way, know that it invites the wrath of God. How righteous wrath is different from some kinds of human anger is something that we will discuss soon. Until then, spend the day knowing that you have a Father who is passionate in his love and care for you, and for all of his children.
Blessings,
Ron
P.S. – This devotional thought is developed from a sermon by a friend of mine, Sheldon DeVries.
With some considerable pride you set out for Jerusalem and the Passover feast. The city is unimaginably crowded with countless pilgrims and their sacrifices. Nathan waits in line for his opportunity to enter the Temple and offer his lamb. As you enter the temple courts, a priest asks you if you have your temple tax, so you prompt Nathan, who reaches into his bag and shows the coins. “No,” says the priest, “these coins can’t be taken into the temple – they have the image of Caesar stamped on them. They’re idolatrous!” Nathan looks at you for a clue as to what to do, but you’re both on unfamiliar ground here.
“So what are we supposed to do?” you ask.
The priest points over to a table on one side of the entrance and says, “You’ll have to take this Roman money over there and exchange it for temple coins.” You start to balk, but one of the temple guards glares at you and nods his head in the direction of the exchange tables. You are mad, but grudgingly, you make the trade, only to discover that the exchange rate means that you’ve already spent much of the money you’d saved for the trip. You grouse about it to the man exchanging the money, but he just shrugs his shoulders and turns to the next customer.
You pat Nathan on the back, and say, “it’s alright, Nathan, everything will be fine.” You both turn toward the Temple gate.
As you enter, a priest comes up to Nathan to examine his lamb. He shakes his head; “This lamb won’t do – you’ll need to get a replacement.”
“That lamb is perfect,” you growl back, as you see the hurt on Nathan’s face.
“I am the priest, and I make that determination. Think what you want, and say what you will, you will not sacrifice that animal at this temple.” He pauses, then makes an offer: “ That vendor over to the right will buy this grubby little beast, and sell you one that is suitable.”
Your blood is boiling, but your son is watching. You stomp over to the sheep seller, who spends more time assessing you than he does Nathan’s lamb. He makes a ridiculous offer for Nathan’s animal and quotes an astronomical price for the one he is willing, “out of the goodness of his heart,” to sell you. It is as if the man knows exactly how much money you have in your pocket. And the lamb he is selling? It is not half the animal that Nathan’s is.
While struggling with my temper and my decision, a quiet man with this intense face comes up, lifts Nathan’s lamb into his arms, says, “Beautiful animal,” and then asks us to stand over against the wall for a few moments. What happens next is best described in the words of a man who later became a friend of mine:
Jesus went up to Jerusalem. In the temple he found people selling cattle, sheep, and doves, and the money changers seated at their tables. Making a whip of cords, he drove all of them out of the temple, both the sheep and the cattle. He also poured out the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables. He told those who were selling the doves, "Take these things out of here! Stop making my Father's house a marketplace!" His disciples remembered that it was written, "Zeal for your house will consume me." The Jews then said to him, "What sign can you show us for doing this?" Jesus answered them, "Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up." The Jews then said, "This temple has been under construction for forty-six years, and will you raise it up in three days?" But he was speaking of the temple of his body. After he was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered that he had said this; and they believed the scripture and the word that Jesus had spoken.
John 2:13-22 – NRSV
What does the righteous anger of God look like? This story provides us with one sample. Let’s hear the words of David describing the holy wrath of God:
Then the earth reeled and rocked;
the foundations of the heavens trembled
and quaked, because he was angry.
Smoke went up from his nostrils,
and devouring fire from his mouth;
glowing coals flamed forth from him.
He bowed the heavens, and came down;
thick darkness was under his feet.
He rode on a cherub, and flew;
he was seen upon the wings of the wind.
He made darkness around him a canopy,
thick clouds, a gathering of water.
Out of the brightness before him
coals of fire flamed forth.
The Lord thundered from heaven;
the Most High uttered his voice.
He sent out arrows, and scattered them —
lightning, and routed them.
Then the channels of the sea were seen,
the foundations of the world were laid bare
at the rebuke of the Lord,
at the blast of the breath of his nostrils.
He reached from on high, he took me,
he drew me out of mighty waters.
He delivered me from my strong enemy,
from those who hated me;
for they were too mighty for me.
They came upon me in the day of my calamity,
but the Lord was my stay.
He brought me out into a broad place;
he delivered me, because he delighted in me.
2 Samuel 22:8-20 – NRSV
When evil interferes with you, the child of God, know that it does not please God. When someone treats a child in an evil way, know that it invites the wrath of God. How righteous wrath is different from some kinds of human anger is something that we will discuss soon. Until then, spend the day knowing that you have a Father who is passionate in his love and care for you, and for all of his children.
Blessings,
Ron
P.S. – This devotional thought is developed from a sermon by a friend of mine, Sheldon DeVries.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Who do you want me to be?
Sometimes the most troubling sources of unmet expectations are relationships. You might remember, for example, the romance between Michal and David. They had issues from the first, and it always seemed difficult for either one to get the relationship to the place they wanted it to be. The scriptures say that Michal loved David (which only leaves us to wonder how David felt about Michal). Michal, at great risk to her own life, helps David escape her father, Saul. Then, because David is hiding out in the wilderness, Saul pawns Michal off on Paltiel, who genuinely loves her. Once David becomes king, he demands that Michal be returned to him. Which brings us to this difficult story:
So David went and brought up the ark of God from the house of Obed-edom to the city of David with rejoicing; and when those who bore the ark of the Lord had gone six paces, he sacrificed an ox and a fatling. David danced before the Lord with all his might; David was girded with a linen ephod. So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the Lord with shouting, and with the sound of the trumpet.
As the ark of the Lord came into the city of David, Michal daughter of Saul looked out of the window, and saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord; and she despised him in her heart.
They brought in the ark of the Lord, and set it in its place, inside the tent that David had pitched for it; and David offered burnt offerings and offerings of well-being before the Lord. . . .
David returned to bless his household. But Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David, and said, "How the king of Israel honored himself today, uncovering himself today before the eyes of his servants' maids, as any vulgar fellow might shamelessly uncover himself!" David said to Michal, "It was before the Lord, who chose me in place of your father and all his household, to appoint me as prince over Israel, the people of the Lord, that I have danced before the Lord. I will make myself yet more contemptible than this, and I will be abased in my own eyes; but by the maids of whom you have spoken, by them I shall be held in honor." And Michal the daughter of Saul had no child to the day of her death.
2 Samuel 6:12-23 – NRSV
Michael “despised him in her heart” when David did not behave as she believed a king should behave. Paltiel worshiped her and only her; David tends to be non-committal to all of his wives, and devotes all of his worship to Yahweh, the God with whom her father had such a troubled relationship. “At least my father knew how to behave like a king,” she thinks. Then she speaks sentences that mercilessly drip sarcasm to David as he walks through the front door. “How the king of Israel honored himself today . . . ,” meaning exactly the opposite. And then she rebukes him for exposing his handsome physique to other women, as if he didn’t have enough. Obviously this stirs more than one jealous bone in Michal’s body.
Michal is furious because she doesn’t have the husband/wife relationship that she wants. She has expectations that David does not meet, nor does he appear to plan to meet them. So she: (1) finds fault with her mate’s behavior. (2) Uses deliberately punitive language, not in a real attempt to change the behavior, but in order to hurt. (3) Keeps inflaming the situation with her anger until she gets a similar response of anger from her partner.
Don’t think for a moment that I find David faultless here. But the question that a counselor might ask Michal is, “So, how’s that working for you?” If Michal were to be honest, she would have to admit that her way of dealing with this relationship wasn’t working. And this time, as she applies force to try to shift the situation back to something she considers to be normal, she uses too much force and breaks the relationship. Permanently.
I don’t think that Michal has stopped loving David. Michal has stopped trusting David. That is understandable on so many fronts. Instead of working on the trust issue, though, she mugs him on every other issue until he no longer trusts her either. Once both parties have lost trust, there is not much of a relationship left. Just anger. Anger over unmet expectations of what it ought to be like to have a loving spouse.
Does this connect with our lives anywhere? Perhaps this applies to your relationship with a spouse, but maybe it better describes a relationship with someone else. Are we angry with someone because they won’t shape their relationship with us according to our expectations? Why do we feel the need to control the relationship? Why don’t we trust them? We had better answer those questions and deal with the answers if we want to keep that relationship.
The problem of unmet expectations about relationships applies to our boys, too. Imagine how they feel when their mom or their dad just won’t be the kind of parent that they idealize. They want that relationship to be right, but when it doesn’t work, their anger begins to take over one part of their life after another. We can never be their “real” mom or dad, but we can be the kind of parental figure that is predictable, and loving, and safe. And eventually, that may allow them to let some of their anger go.
Every relationship is precious and unique, so work hard to preserve them.
Show grace, live in peace –
Ron
So David went and brought up the ark of God from the house of Obed-edom to the city of David with rejoicing; and when those who bore the ark of the Lord had gone six paces, he sacrificed an ox and a fatling. David danced before the Lord with all his might; David was girded with a linen ephod. So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the Lord with shouting, and with the sound of the trumpet.
As the ark of the Lord came into the city of David, Michal daughter of Saul looked out of the window, and saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord; and she despised him in her heart.
They brought in the ark of the Lord, and set it in its place, inside the tent that David had pitched for it; and David offered burnt offerings and offerings of well-being before the Lord. . . .
David returned to bless his household. But Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David, and said, "How the king of Israel honored himself today, uncovering himself today before the eyes of his servants' maids, as any vulgar fellow might shamelessly uncover himself!" David said to Michal, "It was before the Lord, who chose me in place of your father and all his household, to appoint me as prince over Israel, the people of the Lord, that I have danced before the Lord. I will make myself yet more contemptible than this, and I will be abased in my own eyes; but by the maids of whom you have spoken, by them I shall be held in honor." And Michal the daughter of Saul had no child to the day of her death.
2 Samuel 6:12-23 – NRSV
Michael “despised him in her heart” when David did not behave as she believed a king should behave. Paltiel worshiped her and only her; David tends to be non-committal to all of his wives, and devotes all of his worship to Yahweh, the God with whom her father had such a troubled relationship. “At least my father knew how to behave like a king,” she thinks. Then she speaks sentences that mercilessly drip sarcasm to David as he walks through the front door. “How the king of Israel honored himself today . . . ,” meaning exactly the opposite. And then she rebukes him for exposing his handsome physique to other women, as if he didn’t have enough. Obviously this stirs more than one jealous bone in Michal’s body.
Michal is furious because she doesn’t have the husband/wife relationship that she wants. She has expectations that David does not meet, nor does he appear to plan to meet them. So she: (1) finds fault with her mate’s behavior. (2) Uses deliberately punitive language, not in a real attempt to change the behavior, but in order to hurt. (3) Keeps inflaming the situation with her anger until she gets a similar response of anger from her partner.
Don’t think for a moment that I find David faultless here. But the question that a counselor might ask Michal is, “So, how’s that working for you?” If Michal were to be honest, she would have to admit that her way of dealing with this relationship wasn’t working. And this time, as she applies force to try to shift the situation back to something she considers to be normal, she uses too much force and breaks the relationship. Permanently.
I don’t think that Michal has stopped loving David. Michal has stopped trusting David. That is understandable on so many fronts. Instead of working on the trust issue, though, she mugs him on every other issue until he no longer trusts her either. Once both parties have lost trust, there is not much of a relationship left. Just anger. Anger over unmet expectations of what it ought to be like to have a loving spouse.
Does this connect with our lives anywhere? Perhaps this applies to your relationship with a spouse, but maybe it better describes a relationship with someone else. Are we angry with someone because they won’t shape their relationship with us according to our expectations? Why do we feel the need to control the relationship? Why don’t we trust them? We had better answer those questions and deal with the answers if we want to keep that relationship.
The problem of unmet expectations about relationships applies to our boys, too. Imagine how they feel when their mom or their dad just won’t be the kind of parent that they idealize. They want that relationship to be right, but when it doesn’t work, their anger begins to take over one part of their life after another. We can never be their “real” mom or dad, but we can be the kind of parental figure that is predictable, and loving, and safe. And eventually, that may allow them to let some of their anger go.
Every relationship is precious and unique, so work hard to preserve them.
Show grace, live in peace –
Ron
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Expecting safety, experiencing fear, feeling angry
“Be afraid. Be very afraid.” People who are parents, and people who serve in the place of parents, are going to experience fear.
This is because their children will do things, or their children will experience things, that will scare them silly. Consider the example of Mary:
Now every year his parents went to Jerusalem for the festival of the Passover. And when he was twelve years old, they went up as usual for the festival. When the festival was ended and they started to return, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but his parents did not know it. Assuming that he was in the group of travelers, they went a day's journey. Then they started to look for him among their relatives and friends.
When they did not find him, they returned to Jerusalem to search for him. After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard him were amazed at his understanding and his answers. When his parents saw him they were astonished; and his mother said to him, "Child, why have you treated us like this? Look, your father and I have been searching for you in great anxiety." He said to them, "Why were you searching for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house?” But they did not understand what he said to them. Then he went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them. His mother treasured all these things in her heart.
And Jesus increased in wisdom and in years, and in divine and human favor.
Luke 2:41-52 - NRSV
It is not difficult to imagine the fear of Mary and Joseph. Think about needing to say this prayer: “O Lord, it appears that we have lost your only begotten son. Help!” It wouldn’t help to know that God would already be perfectly aware of your dilemma. Of your parental shortcomings. The sinking feeling that a parent has in their gut when they know something is wrong for one of their children can be an overwhelming kind of fear.
A troubled pregnancy. An uncontrolled fever. Crying that won’t stop. The unexpected visit to the emergency room. Missing in the mall. The unimaginable fall. An encounter with truly evil people. A car accident. A poor choice for a romantic relationship. For any parent that is awake, these can be fearful situations.
But look what happens when the fear is past. Anger. Anger taken to the very limit of words. Even from the saintly Mary. Can’t you hear it in her voice? “Child, why have you treated us like this?”
The reality is that anger frequently follows fear. Why is this? As humans we have an expectation of safety even though we are intelligent enough to know that the world is not exactly a safe place. To be able to function at all, those of us who maintain some level of sanity learn how to deal with that lack of safety. Sometimes we establish complex systems designed to guarantee that safety. We choose houses in certain locations, either for their remoteness or the level of police protection. We install locks. We exercise vigilance. We practice denial. Which is all fine until you take those precious babies outside your little castle and have them interact with other human beings.
Every measure of safety can be defeated. Which means that safety is too frequently is either relative or an illusion. Yet there is one exception to the safety problem. God. Hear the words of David:
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer,
my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield and the horn of my salvation,
my stronghold and my refuge,
my savior; you save me from violence.
I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised,
and I am saved from my enemies.
2 Samuel 22:2-4 – NRSV
(If you really want to feel safe in the protection of God, read the rest of that chapter.) Do you think perhaps that even the courageous David experienced fear and anger? I think that it is a near certainty. Yet the source of safety for this great person was God. Only God.
So how will we avoid anger after we experience fear? I don’t think that we can or ought to try to stop the feelings, but I do think that we need to be careful what we do with them. I don’t think that we can avoid the anger, but we have listen to what it is telling us. Our expectation of safety has been disappointed. How can we regain safety? There may be things that we can do. But if it is possible at all, it will be with our God, our Rock. We must trust him, and believe, even when it is not readily apparent, that he is in control (and ought to be).
One other thing. If dealing with fear and anger are so difficult for us as adults, who have some level of maturity (mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual), can we imagine what this fear and anger might be like for a child? Can we contemplate the overwhelming feelings that an abused or neglected child feels when they have been living in the survival mode, the mode of fear, for years? Can we imagine the anger on the other side of their fear? Perhaps thinking about this will move us to construct a little corner of God’s kingdom in our homes so that the children in our care can experience safety. Perhaps for the first time in recent history. Yet they may have to experience safety for a while before they can make safe, and not angry, choices for themselves.
Lean upon the Rock. Hide behind him on the really tough days. He wants you to rely on him.
Blessings,
Ron
This is because their children will do things, or their children will experience things, that will scare them silly. Consider the example of Mary:
Now every year his parents went to Jerusalem for the festival of the Passover. And when he was twelve years old, they went up as usual for the festival. When the festival was ended and they started to return, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but his parents did not know it. Assuming that he was in the group of travelers, they went a day's journey. Then they started to look for him among their relatives and friends.
When they did not find him, they returned to Jerusalem to search for him. After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard him were amazed at his understanding and his answers. When his parents saw him they were astonished; and his mother said to him, "Child, why have you treated us like this? Look, your father and I have been searching for you in great anxiety." He said to them, "Why were you searching for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house?” But they did not understand what he said to them. Then he went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them. His mother treasured all these things in her heart.
And Jesus increased in wisdom and in years, and in divine and human favor.
Luke 2:41-52 - NRSV
It is not difficult to imagine the fear of Mary and Joseph. Think about needing to say this prayer: “O Lord, it appears that we have lost your only begotten son. Help!” It wouldn’t help to know that God would already be perfectly aware of your dilemma. Of your parental shortcomings. The sinking feeling that a parent has in their gut when they know something is wrong for one of their children can be an overwhelming kind of fear.
A troubled pregnancy. An uncontrolled fever. Crying that won’t stop. The unexpected visit to the emergency room. Missing in the mall. The unimaginable fall. An encounter with truly evil people. A car accident. A poor choice for a romantic relationship. For any parent that is awake, these can be fearful situations.
But look what happens when the fear is past. Anger. Anger taken to the very limit of words. Even from the saintly Mary. Can’t you hear it in her voice? “Child, why have you treated us like this?”
The reality is that anger frequently follows fear. Why is this? As humans we have an expectation of safety even though we are intelligent enough to know that the world is not exactly a safe place. To be able to function at all, those of us who maintain some level of sanity learn how to deal with that lack of safety. Sometimes we establish complex systems designed to guarantee that safety. We choose houses in certain locations, either for their remoteness or the level of police protection. We install locks. We exercise vigilance. We practice denial. Which is all fine until you take those precious babies outside your little castle and have them interact with other human beings.
Every measure of safety can be defeated. Which means that safety is too frequently is either relative or an illusion. Yet there is one exception to the safety problem. God. Hear the words of David:
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer,
my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield and the horn of my salvation,
my stronghold and my refuge,
my savior; you save me from violence.
I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised,
and I am saved from my enemies.
2 Samuel 22:2-4 – NRSV
(If you really want to feel safe in the protection of God, read the rest of that chapter.) Do you think perhaps that even the courageous David experienced fear and anger? I think that it is a near certainty. Yet the source of safety for this great person was God. Only God.
So how will we avoid anger after we experience fear? I don’t think that we can or ought to try to stop the feelings, but I do think that we need to be careful what we do with them. I don’t think that we can avoid the anger, but we have listen to what it is telling us. Our expectation of safety has been disappointed. How can we regain safety? There may be things that we can do. But if it is possible at all, it will be with our God, our Rock. We must trust him, and believe, even when it is not readily apparent, that he is in control (and ought to be).
One other thing. If dealing with fear and anger are so difficult for us as adults, who have some level of maturity (mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual), can we imagine what this fear and anger might be like for a child? Can we contemplate the overwhelming feelings that an abused or neglected child feels when they have been living in the survival mode, the mode of fear, for years? Can we imagine the anger on the other side of their fear? Perhaps thinking about this will move us to construct a little corner of God’s kingdom in our homes so that the children in our care can experience safety. Perhaps for the first time in recent history. Yet they may have to experience safety for a while before they can make safe, and not angry, choices for themselves.
Lean upon the Rock. Hide behind him on the really tough days. He wants you to rely on him.
Blessings,
Ron
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
An expectation of joy ...
In the beginning …
If ever there was a time that could be called perfect, this was it. Again and again, God speaks things into existence. When the Creator sees his work, he sees that it is good, and it really is. Into this flawless world, this perfect cosmos, God inserts two perfectly healthy, hand-matched, hand-made human beings. Adam is overwhelmed. When the Namer first sees his mate, he is quick to name her and claim her; he is content that he finally has the perfect helpmeet. Together, walking, and talking, and working with God are just as natural and pleasurable as any life could possibly be.
Unfortunately, most humans experience satisfaction as a fleeting feeling, a passing moment. The experience of Adam and Eve is no different. The Adversary picks on the one who did not personally hear the instruction to avoid the tree of good and evil to find a gap to jab in his wedge of doubt. But the one who heard the instruction stands right there, without a word of protest, as doubt is cast upon the trustworthiness of God. The adversary inserts distrust into human minds: “Perhaps the Creator did not tell us the truth about the tree.” The adversary inserts a desire into human hearts – a desire for mastery and control: “Perhaps if we possess the knowledge of good and evil then we can control our garden, our world, just as God controls it now.”
And so, for the very first time, man and woman experienced something negative together; they expected something other than that which God was giving them. Neither human was flawed, because they were both perfectly made by the Creator of all creation. Yet because of their free wills, they both failed and fell. They both were separated from the tree of life, and consequently, they both started dying the day they chose unsafely. What God said would happen began to happen.
Now people have read into this scripture a dozen things that it does not say. They make it out that somehow either man or woman, or both, become something less than what they were created to be. The scripture does not say this. God describes things that would happen to them outside of the garden, and he describes things that they would do to each other, but he did not prescribe that humans would become less than human. He merely mourns the fact that from here on out, because of their freedom of choice (one of the ways they live in the image of God), and because of their separation from a daily walk with God, every human being will choose to exercise their freedom of choice to rebel against God and his will. Every human will choose to behave less than humanly. Every one, that is, except the promised one.
How about us? How much discontent, how much suffering, how much evil comes from our unrealistic expectations, from our unwillingness to choose to be content? How much grief and anger do we create for ourselves because we will not trust God to keep his promises? How much grief and anger do we cause for others because we seek to snatch control of the universe out of the hands of God because we think we can do better or work faster? Haven’t we learned the cost of our discontent yet? Paul counsels us to wisdom: “For I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:11-13 – NRSV).
Most of us have experienced plenty and want. All of us know what it is to be stuffed and to be hollow. Yet, if we are honest, we can say that God has proven to be faithful to us from one extreme to the other. If he is still with us, and he promised that he would be, can we not stop obsessing over controlling every little event in our lives, or those events of our children’s lives, and let God prove his providence? Can we not make it our expectation that God will provide just what we need, just at the right time?
In that expectation, there is joy. There is contentment. There is glory. Not in our conquering the world, but in watching our God work alongside our meager efforts so that he can fill our lives to overflowing with so many good things.
Consequently, dwell today in the words of this psalm:
Praise the Lord!
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,
in the company of the upright, in the congregation.
Great are the works of the Lord,
studied by all who delight in them.
Full of honor and majesty is his work,
and his righteousness endures forever.
He has gained renown by his wonderful deeds;
the Lord is gracious and merciful.
He provides food for those who fear him;
he is ever mindful of his covenant.
He has shown his people the power of his works,
in giving them the heritage of the nations.
The works of his hands are faithful and just;
all his precepts are trustworthy.
They are established forever and ever,
to be performed with faithfulness and uprightness.
He sent redemption to his people;
he has commanded his covenant forever.
Holy and awesome is his name.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;
all those who practice it have a good understanding.
His praise endures forever.
Psalm 111 – NRSV
May his name be praised!
Ron
If ever there was a time that could be called perfect, this was it. Again and again, God speaks things into existence. When the Creator sees his work, he sees that it is good, and it really is. Into this flawless world, this perfect cosmos, God inserts two perfectly healthy, hand-matched, hand-made human beings. Adam is overwhelmed. When the Namer first sees his mate, he is quick to name her and claim her; he is content that he finally has the perfect helpmeet. Together, walking, and talking, and working with God are just as natural and pleasurable as any life could possibly be.
Unfortunately, most humans experience satisfaction as a fleeting feeling, a passing moment. The experience of Adam and Eve is no different. The Adversary picks on the one who did not personally hear the instruction to avoid the tree of good and evil to find a gap to jab in his wedge of doubt. But the one who heard the instruction stands right there, without a word of protest, as doubt is cast upon the trustworthiness of God. The adversary inserts distrust into human minds: “Perhaps the Creator did not tell us the truth about the tree.” The adversary inserts a desire into human hearts – a desire for mastery and control: “Perhaps if we possess the knowledge of good and evil then we can control our garden, our world, just as God controls it now.”
And so, for the very first time, man and woman experienced something negative together; they expected something other than that which God was giving them. Neither human was flawed, because they were both perfectly made by the Creator of all creation. Yet because of their free wills, they both failed and fell. They both were separated from the tree of life, and consequently, they both started dying the day they chose unsafely. What God said would happen began to happen.
Now people have read into this scripture a dozen things that it does not say. They make it out that somehow either man or woman, or both, become something less than what they were created to be. The scripture does not say this. God describes things that would happen to them outside of the garden, and he describes things that they would do to each other, but he did not prescribe that humans would become less than human. He merely mourns the fact that from here on out, because of their freedom of choice (one of the ways they live in the image of God), and because of their separation from a daily walk with God, every human being will choose to exercise their freedom of choice to rebel against God and his will. Every human will choose to behave less than humanly. Every one, that is, except the promised one.
How about us? How much discontent, how much suffering, how much evil comes from our unrealistic expectations, from our unwillingness to choose to be content? How much grief and anger do we create for ourselves because we will not trust God to keep his promises? How much grief and anger do we cause for others because we seek to snatch control of the universe out of the hands of God because we think we can do better or work faster? Haven’t we learned the cost of our discontent yet? Paul counsels us to wisdom: “For I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:11-13 – NRSV).
Most of us have experienced plenty and want. All of us know what it is to be stuffed and to be hollow. Yet, if we are honest, we can say that God has proven to be faithful to us from one extreme to the other. If he is still with us, and he promised that he would be, can we not stop obsessing over controlling every little event in our lives, or those events of our children’s lives, and let God prove his providence? Can we not make it our expectation that God will provide just what we need, just at the right time?
In that expectation, there is joy. There is contentment. There is glory. Not in our conquering the world, but in watching our God work alongside our meager efforts so that he can fill our lives to overflowing with so many good things.
Consequently, dwell today in the words of this psalm:
Praise the Lord!
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,
in the company of the upright, in the congregation.
Great are the works of the Lord,
studied by all who delight in them.
Full of honor and majesty is his work,
and his righteousness endures forever.
He has gained renown by his wonderful deeds;
the Lord is gracious and merciful.
He provides food for those who fear him;
he is ever mindful of his covenant.
He has shown his people the power of his works,
in giving them the heritage of the nations.
The works of his hands are faithful and just;
all his precepts are trustworthy.
They are established forever and ever,
to be performed with faithfulness and uprightness.
He sent redemption to his people;
he has commanded his covenant forever.
Holy and awesome is his name.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;
all those who practice it have a good understanding.
His praise endures forever.
Psalm 111 – NRSV
May his name be praised!
Ron
Monday, November 10, 2008
The fruit of unmet expectations ...
Have you ever had a day when things didn’t go like you wanted? A day where, no matter what you did, you couldn’t seem to get rid of the anger? Consider Cain’s anger problem …
In the course of time Cain brought to the Lord an offering of the fruit of the ground, and Abel for his part brought of the firstlings of his flock, their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his countenance fell. The Lord said to Cain, "Why are you angry, and why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is lurking at the door; its desire is for you, but you must master it."
Cain said to his brother Abel, "Let us go out to the field." And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" He said, "I do not know; am I my brother's keeper?" And the Lord said, "What have you done? Listen; your brother's blood is crying out to me from the ground! And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. When you till the ground, it will no longer yield to you its strength; you will be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth." Cain said to the Lord, "My punishment is greater than I can bear! Today you have driven me away from the soil, and I shall be hidden from your face; I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and anyone who meets me may kill me." Then the Lord said to him, "Not so! Whoever kills Cain will suffer a sevenfold vengeance." And the Lord put a mark on Cain, so that no one who came upon him would kill him. Then Cain went away from the presence of the Lord, and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden.
Genesis 4:3-16 – NRSV
Cain is mad at Abel. Cain is mad at God. Where did this anger come from? Why could Cain not quench this burning well of anger? What kept feeding it? Those are the questions that we will consider in greater detail this week: where anger comes from; how it affects the individual; how it deforms or reforms a community.
But for the moment, let’s just say that anger is the fruit of unmet expectations. Regardless of whether Cain offered the correct sacrifice, or whether he offered it with the right heart, he expected God to accept the sacrifice. Was that a realistic expectation? Did Cain allow God to have the freedom of choice to accept the sacrifice or not? When Cain's expectations for acceptance were not met, someone had to bear the blame. Enter Abel. Abel looks like the right person to blame; he's someone upon whom Cain can vent his anger, because, after all, God accepted Abel’s offering. God warns Cain about his anger, and points out its source to him, but Cain ignores the wisdom of the Lord. Exit Abel. Permanently.
While maintaining a merciful hand, God gives Cain the natural consequences of his violent act. Cain gets angry with God over that. Cain refuses the responsibility for his own circumstances and his own actions. His expectations don’t connect with reality. Instead of working through these differences, Cain stokes the emotional fires of anger and hate. It can’t be his fault, after all.
What are the unmet expectations with which you struggle today? What parts of your life are not like you want them? How do you deal with disappointments? Even if these desires are for things that are good or just, are you shaping your emotional response, or are your emotions controlling you? Do these frustrated expectations show up as hyper-sensitivity, as crankiness, as anger?
Today, let's consider the sources of frustration in our lives. What kinds of responses do we make to those frustrations? Can we think of ways that we might break the cycle? Let’s work together this week to find spiritual responses to these trying dilemmas.
Blessings,
Ron
In the course of time Cain brought to the Lord an offering of the fruit of the ground, and Abel for his part brought of the firstlings of his flock, their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his countenance fell. The Lord said to Cain, "Why are you angry, and why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is lurking at the door; its desire is for you, but you must master it."
Cain said to his brother Abel, "Let us go out to the field." And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" He said, "I do not know; am I my brother's keeper?" And the Lord said, "What have you done? Listen; your brother's blood is crying out to me from the ground! And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. When you till the ground, it will no longer yield to you its strength; you will be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth." Cain said to the Lord, "My punishment is greater than I can bear! Today you have driven me away from the soil, and I shall be hidden from your face; I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and anyone who meets me may kill me." Then the Lord said to him, "Not so! Whoever kills Cain will suffer a sevenfold vengeance." And the Lord put a mark on Cain, so that no one who came upon him would kill him. Then Cain went away from the presence of the Lord, and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden.
Genesis 4:3-16 – NRSV
Cain is mad at Abel. Cain is mad at God. Where did this anger come from? Why could Cain not quench this burning well of anger? What kept feeding it? Those are the questions that we will consider in greater detail this week: where anger comes from; how it affects the individual; how it deforms or reforms a community.
But for the moment, let’s just say that anger is the fruit of unmet expectations. Regardless of whether Cain offered the correct sacrifice, or whether he offered it with the right heart, he expected God to accept the sacrifice. Was that a realistic expectation? Did Cain allow God to have the freedom of choice to accept the sacrifice or not? When Cain's expectations for acceptance were not met, someone had to bear the blame. Enter Abel. Abel looks like the right person to blame; he's someone upon whom Cain can vent his anger, because, after all, God accepted Abel’s offering. God warns Cain about his anger, and points out its source to him, but Cain ignores the wisdom of the Lord. Exit Abel. Permanently.
While maintaining a merciful hand, God gives Cain the natural consequences of his violent act. Cain gets angry with God over that. Cain refuses the responsibility for his own circumstances and his own actions. His expectations don’t connect with reality. Instead of working through these differences, Cain stokes the emotional fires of anger and hate. It can’t be his fault, after all.
What are the unmet expectations with which you struggle today? What parts of your life are not like you want them? How do you deal with disappointments? Even if these desires are for things that are good or just, are you shaping your emotional response, or are your emotions controlling you? Do these frustrated expectations show up as hyper-sensitivity, as crankiness, as anger?
Today, let's consider the sources of frustration in our lives. What kinds of responses do we make to those frustrations? Can we think of ways that we might break the cycle? Let’s work together this week to find spiritual responses to these trying dilemmas.
Blessings,
Ron
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